I’ve been running my own business for 20+ years now. And like many solo small business owners, I’ve worn the Chief Sales Officer hat from day one.
Honestly though, I never found sales particularly difficult or daunting, as I assumed I ticked all the boxes for a natural-born salesperson:
☑️ Friendly and confident? Yep.
☑️ Responsive and attentive? You bet.
☑️ Movie-star good looks? Please, let’s not argue.
☑️ Genuinely believe in the service I offer? 100%.
So it stung – a lot – when a red-hot lead would suddenly vanish. I thought we had all the makings of a beautiful partnership. A brilliant discovery call… a great vibe… a swanky tailored proposal…
Then poof. Silence.
Welcome to professional ghosting: business edition. (I’m sure, like me, you’ve experienced it more than once.)
And if you’ve been following me for a while? You’ll know I’ve (publicly) ranted about it. More than once. ‘How rude! How unprofessional! A quick thanks but no thanks isn’t that hard!’
In reality though, I was stuck in a cycle. And deep down, on a subconscious level, I knew something wasn’t working. Was it me? Or was it my process? (Yet, still I wasn’t actively looking for help.)
Then, by pure chance, I came across the bold and brilliant Joanne (Jo) Schonheim on LinkedIn – a senior sales and marketing strategist and former HubSpot executive. She had a sharp, human-centred approach to sales that made me pause. No pushiness. No fluff. Just smart, straight-talking sense. So I reached out.
And not long after, I brought her on as our sales coach. Best. Call. Ever.
Jo started with a deep dive into our entire sales process. Every step. Every email. Every awkward follow-up. And what she uncovered? Oof.
She (gently, but firmly) showed us just how many steps and stages were tripping us up. Some came from being too eager. Others from too much passive wishful thinking.
And all of them were costing our team time, energy… and confidence.
Here are the five biggest mistakes I was making that Jo uncovered.
1. Sending proposals too early
My old mindset? A swanky proposal is the natural next step after a good discovery call. My new mindset? A proposal is a reward – not a giveaway.
Jo put it perfectly: a prospect should feel honoured to receive a proposal from you.
It should only be sent when you’re 99.99% sure the project is going to be approved – when you’ve confirmed budget, decision-maker status, scope and intent. Anything earlier is just doing free work for someone who may not be serious.
And let’s be honest: how many of us are writing proposals that are half pitch, half prayer?
2. Chasing the uninterested
You know the ones. They send an enquiry late on a Tuesday night. You respond promptly. Book a call. Maybe you even prepare and send a detailed proposal. And then… crickets.
Here’s the painful reality: just because someone filled in a contact form doesn’t mean they’re ready – or even truly interested.
Sometimes it’s a moment of impulse. Sometimes they’re window shopping. And sometimes they’ve just gone cold and don’t have the guts to say it.
Following up time and again doesn’t make you diligent. It makes you someone who doesn’t know how to read the room.
3. Playing the beauty pageant game
I’ve had so many ‘great chats’ with prospects, only to find out later I was one of three required quotes.
They were never planning to work with me. They were just ticking a procurement box.
Now, thanks to Jo, I’m much better at spotting the signs. Vague responses. Lack of urgency. No real questions about how we’d work together – just ‘Can you send a quote?’.
That’s not a real opportunity. That’s a time-waster.
4. Talking to the wrong person
I’ve spent way too long explaining the value of our work to people who were never going to sign off on it. Lovely people, sure. But with no decision-making power. And no budget.
If your prospect has to ‘take it to the team’ or ‘check with the boss’, you’re not in a sales conversation. You’re in a game of broken telephone.
Now we ask early: Who else needs to be involved in this decision?
5. Not qualifying properly (or at all)
I used to treat every lead like gold. Now? I qualify harder than a bouncer at an exclusive club.
Qualifying isn’t about arrogance. It’s about respect – for your time, your expertise and your energy.
Ask the right questions up front. Understand their pain points, budget, urgency and goals. If it’s not a match, bless and release.
The irony? By being more selective, I’ve closed better clients, faster – and with less chasing.
Ready to stop getting ghosted too?
I used to think ghosting was just the price of doing business. But in reality? It was the price of not doing business better.
Thanks to Jo, our sales process is tighter, more intentional and a whole lot more enjoyable.
No chasing shadows. No handing out proposals like party favours. And no pretending every lead is worth the same energy.
If you’re sick of getting ghosted, here’s my blunt advice: Stop blaming the ghost. Start reviewing your own process.
Want your sales team to sell with more confidence, clarity and success?
Check out our course, The Science of Sales Conversion – led by none other than the brilliant Joanne Shoneheim (of course).